She wants to lead the glamorous life!

Thursday, August 9, 2012

The Best

I am a worrier.  I worry about all sorts of things.  One thing in particular that often concerns me is who I might be beefin' with or who I have offended.  Maybe because it has been said that I have stepped on my share of toes.  Whether it is intentional or not, true or false, that is what has been told to me.  I was just thinking to myself, how many people in my life are not speaking to me.  The number seemed huge.  But upon further review, I realized that simply is not true.  First, when I count the family and friends in my life who don't return texts, ain't feeling me, are not speaking to me, the number is surely not small.  But, those people in my life who do, supercede it by far.  Then I had to step back and define my idea of being 'in my life.'  If we are not talking and have not spoken in months- hell years, no matter the familial connection.  You cannot be considered 'in my life.'  That fact alone allowed me to exhale.

You do your best.  With family, you send that birthday text your mother reminded you about, knowing it will not be replied to- ever.  You celebrate your birthday without receiving your text (I guess their mother/father did not remind them).  With friends, you call them consecutively, and try to subside any irritation when the call is not answered or returned.  You do your best.  You give the most concrete and clear advice when you know someone is going down a less than favorable path.  When they continue that journey, you SHUT THE FUCK UP!  All the while, you do your best.  You reach out when you can and pull back when it is necessary.  And pray always.  Not only for them, but mainly for you.  Knowing that this is not the last time your words will be misconstrued or misunderstood.  You just do your best.

1 comment:

  1. Keep sending out good, don't concern yourself with what others do.